kata; maaf.

maaf itu bukannya sesuatu yang dikatakan ketika seseorang menyesali perbuatannya?

dan menyesal itu,

bukannya berarti tidak akan melakukannya lagi untuk kedua kali, ketiga kali, dan seterusnya?

bila mereka meminta maaf,
dan melakukannya lagi di kemudian hari,

bukankah itu bukan suatu permintaan maaf?

maaf, aku akan melakukannya lagi.

Chapter III -Another Yard-

Chapter III -Another Yard-

-------25 July, 2012. today Carlo and some others are being graduated. they go to the different schools but they always assemble in the same place, this field. I got good pictures today, from they joy and happy faces. just like a daily habit, after I finished my work, we play soccer. I don't know how, but I'm at my best at taking sport photos. hope someday I'm good at taking photos of everything. the next day, after playing soccer, we eat, talk and laugh at Tagliatelle Bella. of course, I'm the one who cook the whole meals. "attention, everyone! I wanna say something for you guys. first of all I just want to thank to you guys to lead my best days in Venice, in Italy. I can never enjoy my days here if Carlo didn't invite me to the field, so thanks to you guys. it was very felicitating 3 months here. I got a very meaningful lesson about friendship. and also good pictures too." "what is it? it just sounds like a farewell, chie." "yep Carlo, that's what I'm trying to say. I'm gonna take another yard across the sea to continue my trip."
-------Saturday, I arrived at the airport at 9.00 am I have my flight at 10.00. everybody I have in Italy is there. Alfonso with his employees and Carlo with the others. "so where are you going, chie?" Carlo asks. "well, it's France. I always wanted to go there and finally it comes true today." "well, good luck then." "thanks. oh by the way, this is your shirt, Carlo. thanks for let me borrow it." "ah it's not a big problem, even better, you can have it." "really?" "yeah, we got hundreds of it here. take it as a gift from us here." "well thank you, Carlo. I don't know how to show my thanks to you. and Alfonso, should I give my apron back to you?" "hahaha. not necessary, piccoli. you are one of the best chef I ever had." "oh Richie, here's the menu I have copy for you. in case you forgot how to make those dishes." "thanks, Elario, Alfonso, Tagliatelle Bella. well I should be going and you guys have to go back to your routines, guys." as I walk along the path to the departure lounge, they shout "BYE CHIEEE, BUONA VORTUNA E DIO VI BENEDICA!!!" it means 'good luck and god bless' I smile brightly and gave them a waving hand. I finally got in to my plane at 10.00 the memories in Venice, even if it's not too long, spinning around my head and accompany me to sleep. bye Venice.
-------as soon as I arrive at Charlie de Gaulle airport in Paris, I got a taxi and go to the tower of love, Eiffel Tower. I came out from the taxi, pay it, told the driver to stay awhile, and breath heavily in front of the Eiffel Tower. I told the taxi driver to take a picture of me. I know this day will come. Kevin was the one who made me believe. but a thing that saddening is, there's no Kevin in my picture here. Evian, the taxi driver told me about the tower and everything he knows until I arrive at my lodge. on the way to the lodge what I see is romance. yes, here I am, in the city where break ups rarely found, the city where parents rather give their kids money for dating than for their fun, the city of romance, the city of love, Paris. just like Venice, here in Paris is absolutely less pollution than in Jakarta. they prefer travel around with bikes, subway trains, or electric-powered-vehicles. I stay at a very homie lodging. it feels just like my own house. it's not too big, actually. just have 2 floors and 10 rooms.
-------28 July 2012, I wake up this morning and going to search for a job. just after take a bath, I open the door and at the same time what I see across my room is a pretty girl who instantly look away and go through the door. I wonder why she did that and I realize I stared at her for hours, err... maybe not that long, just a phrase. but whatever, I go out from the lodge and search for a job. it's a tough decision for jobs here. and one thing is, I don't wanna be a salary man! this is a hard day to search a job, and I didn't realize it's 7.00 pm already and I haven't got any job. I'm tired. I buy a glass of cappuccino and sit on a chair on the bridge near the lodge.then I lit a cigarette and turn on my camera. the bridge is beautiful. the fountain behind the bridge completing the scenery. what I see around the bridge is couples, no matter how old they are, what profession they are, what nationality they are. "garcon, vous avez un match?" "wha? oh oui, ici." suddenly a 50's man come to me and ask for a match. luckily, I learned France and Germany language in high school. so at least I can communicate easier in those countries. "vous n'etes pas d'ici, toi?" "non, Je suis Indonesien." "ah I see. your France not really bad. how could you learn?" "well, I learned France and Germany at the high school." "Je suis Norman, J'ai 56 ans." as I expected, he is 50's lol. "Je suis Richie, J'ai 19 ans. nice to know you Norman." "19?! what are you doing here in France?" I told him the story even in Venice. "hmm I see. so now you're looking for a job? err maybe I can get you a job, if you want." "really? where?" "I see you with your camera, I'm a photographer too. would you like to be my assistant? well the salary is not too much maybe. I sell my photos for the magazines here. you could learn some from me too." "c'est genial, Norman! of course I accept it!" "that's the spirit I want from a youngster like you, garcon. now let me see what you got."
-------I show him my photos from the airport and Venice, he's humming and shakes his head sometimes when he sees the pictures. "not bad, Richie. you have some guts. how long have you been in this photography thing?" "from high school, but not too often. maybe from college." "oh I see. but you know? don' be too proud. here in France, even some junior highschoolers can do better than that." I started to be provoked but I try to hold it. "now could you take the photo of the fountain? with macro, focus on the fountain, make it all blur." "but it's impossible, Norman. too big to be focused." "that's why I told you Junior highschool children are better than you." he started to make me mad. "fine, Norman. I'll try." I try my best shot, it's so hard to do it. and it takes 5 minutes and I show it to Norman. "here, Norman. take a look." "what is it? the trees are still there, they don't wanna be seen, you know." I try it again for many times. and he keeps harassing my pictures. "still not get better, GARCON." I'm pissed off. "well just show me if you can do it better, vieillard!" "I knew you'll say that, garcon." just in seconds, Norman set the camera, search-and-found the perfect angle, quickly set the zoom and the focus, and *click*. just like that. my mouth is sealed. I am fascinated at the moment. but I still deny it. "only just you do it quicker and just one shot doesn't mean the result is better than mine, let me see it!" when I get closer to him, he point his camera and show me. "here, young man. take a look." I continue my disbelief. the angle, the colour set, the focus, all in the picture..... it's amazing! more than that, it's perfect! "I give up, Norman." "hahaha. give up from what? now pack your things and go home. we'll start from the day after tomorrow."
-------I still don't believe what happened in front of my eyes. It seems impossible. but whatever, I'm lucky to learn something from him. what peeves me is he's such a bastard. I hope I can stand it during with him. so I'm walking back to the lodge myself. it takes about 30 minutes. I packed my camera and put it in the room and then smoke on the veranda of the lodge. "you look upset." I'm shocked, someone greets me with a smooth sound. a girl sound. and you won't believe me, it's the girl across my room. "wha? you shocked me!" "sorry, just trying to be friendly, I guess." "apology accepted. what are you doing? not going to sleep? it's late already." "nah. can't sleep. why don't you?" "just looking for fresh air." "fresh air? you're smoking dude, hahaha." "haha yeah, just daydreaming on the night, I guess." "Trixie." she introduce her name and we shake hands. "Richie." "wooo, rich people. scaaary." "naah, don't miscalled it." "just kidding, pal. so, what upsets you?" "a new term of study, you can say." "you're a student?" "nope, photography things." "nicee. you have to show me some pictures someday." "yeah I will. hey you can play guitar?" "yep, why?" "hold on a second." she takes her guitar from her room and told me to play. "here, Richie. sing me a song." do you know a band named The Script?" "are you kidding me? I love it!" "yeah, they're the best!" so, we sing The Man Who Can't Be Moved by The Script together. "you're the man who can't be moved, aren't you?" "haha, there was a time I was called like that. let's just sing one song and go to sleep and I'll tell you later, kay? choose a song, Trixie!" "To Be With You by Mr Big, Richie." just like that, after we sing the last part "just to be the next to be with you...." she kissed me, and all the memories I had with Nova, are recalled.

Two Roses

I was already remember the date
but after all the exam, it's going late
the plan is spinning around in my head
it's just waiting for all of the set

I put two roses in front off your door
in case, you'll coming back for more
luckily it wasn't a long journey
and I was accompanied by lonely

the number means the date we were born
I put an ice cream because it's what you love instead of corn
my heart is half yours, I pictured it with two-coloured heart
I hope I will see you in the future, when we will not be apart

Chapter II -What Friendship Is-

Chapter II -What Friendship Is-

-------it's 7.00 pm in Venice here, thank god it was a good flight. first thing to do: search for a job! so much job list offered but what will I take? cooking. just had cooking learning on junior high school I think quite enough. at least I learned to turn on the oven and the stove, turn it off back, flip the sunny side eyes, frying oil, and stuff like that. I am interested by a cafe named 'Tagliatelle Bella' which means 'lovely noodles' and as I thought it's special dishes are pasta and noodles. it's a quite nice small cafe on the side of the road. then, I talk to the manager and he's kind. he's 40, his name is Alfonso, he speaks english, spanish, and greece. besides italian, of course. before do the job, he instructs one of the employee to teach me how to cook the dishes. and to show how understanding Alfonso is, he gives me a month to learn. even more, if it's not enough. it's not that easy to turn flours into everything on the menu lists. but what I can say is cooking is fun... although it's not as fun as playing guitar or take some pictures. there are about 6 employees who are working for Alfonso, and the one who teaches me is Elario. he is muscular, tall, and a happy man, I can say. I wonder how will I get those muscles just by spinning those doughs over my head.
-------2 weeks already past, and I already cook my own spaghetties for lunches and meals. why do I have to do job when my parents are rich and they send me bunch of money on every first dates of months? well, I have to feel hardworks before success. on Thursday and Sunday I have my days off unless I want to do more practice with Elario. one day -on Thursday- I have my day off and walk around Venice. it's afternoon and it's less polution, than I had in Jakarta. they rarely use gasoline cars. they use scooters, electric vehicle, or walking around. then I came to a soccer field and watch from outside cage. some highschoolers play soccer. someone on the bench come to me and ask me,"se vuoi giocare?" then I stammered and then he understands,"tourist, yeah?" "yes." "want to come to join us?" "but... I have no equipments to wear." "relax, we have some you can wear. what can I call you?" "call me Richie." "you can call me Carlo." then he lets me come in and lend shoes, socks, and my favorite italian team shirt, AC Milan! after that, he shouts to his friends and speaks italian to them. I don't know what a single thing he talks about but I believe he's introducing me to the others and luckily they accept me very well. "do you play balls?" "yeah, lucky it's my favorite sports." "well then, where do you usually play?" "center midfielder would be nice."
-------so, I play with them. suddenly I remember when I used to be very short and have brown skin, like Indonesian people in general. now I'm at average of height and not that 'black'. I can clearly remember when my friends called me 'short' or 'black' or something like that. very very not suitable to me, that I'm bad-tempered. but as the time goes on I can manage my own anger. back to the field, we enjoy our play and finished it when the sun goes down. "you have some skills, don't you?" "not that great but at least I have the basic of playing soccer." "hey, will you play again tomorrow?" "I've got something to do, sorry. but I think I can do it on Sunday." "okay then, Sunday it is. don't force it if you don't want or can't." "it's nice to play with you guys. see y'all on Sunday" "a piu tardi, Richie!" "sorry?" "it means see you later -___-" "ooh hahaha I got it." so that's it, I go back to the lodging and have an afternoon pray. it was an exhausted day.
-------Sunday, 29 April 2012. I'm in a good mood today. why? I'm almost done my training with Elario and nearly mastering the menu. beside that, I'm gonna play soccer again with Carlo and the others. 3.00 pm and I go to the field after preparing all the equipments. we play 'til 5.30 pm. from now on in Venice play with Carlo is my week routine. not long as I step aside the bench at the park and say bye, I heard a loud sound and when I look back Carlo is in the air, hit by a car and it's a hit-run. what I see at the moment is the visualization of Kevin. "CARLOOO!" I screamed and quickly approach him, bring him in to a taxi and take him to the nearest hospital. and then, I go home when his friends attend. I don't wanna hear or see the worst thing that could happen.
-------Monday, 14 May 2012. I mastered all in the menu already just in three weeks and Alfonso was so happy and amazed when I showed him on Monday, 1 day after Carlo had an accident. good thing that the visitors love my cooking and some of them are Tagliatelle Bella's regulars. "formaggi a pasta and a cup of cappucino in table 10, Richie!" "Si, Elario." on the table 10 is one of some students that come here after school. this cafe is visited by student almost everyday. it's homie, and warm, I don't know how to describe how comfortable Tagliatelle Bella is. Alfonso is a genius man. okay back to the story, where we at? oh yes, I make and deliver the pasta and cappucino. "questo l'ordine, signore." "it's only 2 weeks and you're Italiano is getting better, Richie." "Carlo?! how did you get here???" "dumb, who don't know about Tagliatelle Bella?" "I mean how do you know I work here?" "with a simple idea and a little research. by the way, why didn't you look me recovering?" "Elario! give me a break today! I owe you one!" and that's it, I'm very happy to see him alive and in a good shape. I tell him about Kevin and everything we did together.
-------what I do in Italia is just like that. work hard and play hard. I spend my days by doing some cafe things, eat there when I have my days off and also some photograph experiment things in the cafe, playing soccer with my friends and also take a pictures of them. something I just realize on the team is first, why don't I call them 'Italian' friends? because they're not all Italian. there are Brazilian, Chinese, Spanish, and also African. second, they're not a rich people and they're very friendly. third, when I play with them without Carlo, they told me he's the one who gathered all of them. with the same way he did to me. Tiago said Carlo was juggling a ball himself on this field. this field used to be very dirty and was untreated, so nobody used it. when Tiago look at him, he stopped juggling, smiled, and asked me if he wanna play with him. "until now, we have gathered together for 3 years. thanks to you chie, we still have Carlo." Tiago said. a lesson I got here, in Venice, is whoever you are, we are friends, we are in the same world, we are brothers. there's no way we can doubt the fact we are in the very same fuckin' degree.